5th
The Hills Series 5, Episode 1
This weekend the fifth series of The Hills began airing in the UK on MTV. It’s a bit of a joke that we have to wait several weeks to catch up with our favourite west coasters. Especially as Heidi and Spencer’s wedding has been plastered all over the press including shots of Lauren “drama” Conrad fleeing the scene of the crime, but it’s amusing to see how things pan out.
This week Lauren “drama” Conrad was celebrating an undefined birthday so Lo and Audrina put their hate aside and organised a surprise party for her. If I was LC, I’d watch my back when it comes to surprises because you just don’t know whats lurking around the corner. As it goes, the surprise was aboard a boat (no escape!) and the usual womanizing circuit was there (Brody and Frankie, sadly no JB) to jump up on her and nearly knock her over. The real surprise was when Stephanie jail-bird Twat rocked up with Heidi and claimed she didn’t know it would be an issue (can someone send jailbird a copy of seasons 1, 2 and 3?)
Anyway, as usual Heidi tried to make out like she didnt understand why LC hated her still (again, can we send her some doovdes?) and Lo tried to subtly tell her to do-one. It turns out that this wasn’t enough drama as Heidi’s adorable other half - the young captain birdseye - was up to his own mischief.
The thing that continually cracks me up about beardy-weirdy Spencer is that he is so amazing uncool. He tried to have a guys night out with his “friend” Charlie (have we ever seen him before?) and ends up hitting on the barmaid whilst drinking his marriage-rape shot of choice; petrone.
Has the barmaid never read a gossip magazine? Twat seems to forget that not only does modern technology exist (Heidi is only ever a text away) but also that his every move is being followed by MTV and he gets himself in to deep water. He quickly decides to beat up Cameron (“C’mon, push me dawg”) but is obviously not capable of punching because his hands seem to be made of rubber. Cameron is sympathetic of Spencer’s disability so rubs ketchup on his face to make Twat feel better. See below for the fight scene.
